Back in 2005, I brought yoga into my daily routine after realizing I was having uncomfortable experiences with anger management. I paid the membership fee in a gym close to my home with the intention of doing my practice everyday. I started to feel a change in my emotions, so I stopped practicing yoga. Maybe because I was living the pattern of, “when you feel well, you stop the medication”. I never went back to a similar experience of poor anger management, but anxiety introduced itself with all its power.
Due to the experiences I was dealing with, my mind was focused on doing exercise to keep a body shape that would guarantee approval and acceptance from men. Yoga was not a tool to fulfill that purpose, so I started lifting weights while my body was shouting for help. I tried to convince my body that no matter how it felt, I was getting the approval that I needed. And sadly, that was important to me.
After a couple of years of uncomfortable anxiety, I decided to try other options to heal my body. That was the moment when my journey made a huge turn. I changed my eating habits and start practicing meditation. At the age of 36, I started to built a new connection with my body.
I got pregnant! Running and lifting weights were not a way of exercising for me anymore. I am not saying it is wrong. However, I felt seriously ill while I was doing it. I switched to yoga and practiced almost everyday. This time I felt more connected with my body and my son. Sebi came into this world and I kept up my yoga practice. I tried to run and lift weights, but it really didn’t feel good to me. My body was different in so my ways after giving birth. I continued the yoga practice with the intention of keeping my body fit. It was an exercise that I was able to manage. My brain was still in the pattern of burning calories. However, deep in my heart I knew that this journey would guide me to something new and exciting.
I healed my body very slowly in the perfect rhythm of my yoga practice. Each slow movement counted. I started my teacher training as part of learning about other ways to heal the body.
Boom! 8 months later, I was teaching yoga.
It’s been almost three years since I got my degree as a yoga instructor, and two since I started teaching at the Hines Center. Today I know that yoga was always in my heart, always reminding me of the power of its benefits. It was there waiting for me to open my heart, and learn that there is a way to slowly heal and understand the connection with the body. For me, yoga means meditation. It is one of the forms that keeps my mind present. It’s a tool that I can share with others in order to make their body and mind feel better.
Are you ready to join me?